A really good excuse!

Hi,

I’m late.

Again.

I know!

But I had two job interviews yesterday and a yoga workshop and so last night after choir I was kaput! Forgive me?

So, to the interviews. As you know, and too your horror, I have gone for a job as a Magic Metre Elf.

elf2Yep, one of those little munchkins over there. I don’t know why you have such a big issue about this. I highly doubt I’ll bump into your legions of friends on my rounds and if I do I’ll give them a bag of lollies and they’ll think it’s awesome! Right?

Through a combination of circumstances I was late for the group interview – they changed the venue! So me and one other elf were at the former venue at the allotted time, 1.30pm. At 1.40pm, I politely asked the receptionist if she could check things out. I explained we might be at the wrong spot. She started phoning, walking around trying to investigate. By 1.50pm, I decided to run to the other spot.

So I arrive at 2pm, where all other elves were calmly assembled, sipping water and role-playing how they would deal with nasty customers. I arrived a hot, sweating, grumpy elf and humbly apologised.

A few minutes later, as we were going around saying why we wanted to be Magic Metre Elves (I mean who wouldn’t? – just check out those adorable costumes) my fellow late elf arrived. She wasn’t as red-of-face of me and given I’d guzzled just about our whole designated carafe of water, I poured her a glass. She jumped on the heroic, loving to serve the community bandwagon.

At this point, I threw caution to the wind and explained to the assembled group that the reason we had both been late was that we were actually undercover elves on a secret mission from Santa. True!

Later, when asked how I would deal with someone complaining about their rubbish – apparently some people assume you’re a ‘council’ worker and can deal with all things council – I explained that I would again have to refer them to the big guy in the red suit.

Oh, and one more thing – they asked if I could sing and dance – I said yes, of course 🙂

Love you, Mum

PS> For reasons I have outlined (basically I don’t write LONG stuff) I will not be partaking on NANOWRIMO. Thanks for thinking of me and I look forward to observing how you cope. So, I will in due course, write a story about me kissing the seal…perhaps as an elf?

 

 

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About Heather Gallagher

Heather lives in Ocean Grove with her beautiful family and a dog called Pip. She has a passion for quirky stories. Her first book, Ferret on the Loose, was published in 2013 and was recently listed on the Victorian Premier’s Reading Challenge. The book was inspired by a girl and her ferret, who Heather interviewed while working as a freelance journalist for The Sunday Age. Her column, Yak Attack, ran in the Kids View section for more than a year and allowed Heather to profile people she thought would be of interest to kids. In 2014, she released her first picture book Happy Pants – Why is mummy so sad? This is NOT a story about ferret racing. Rather, it is a heartfelt story about a boy grappling with his Mum’s post-natal depression. Heather’s stories for children have appeared in black dog books Short & Scary anthology and Explore and Challenge magazines. Heather has experience in public speaking – both for children and adults. While, promoting Happy Pants she spoke to groups of counsellors, nurses, parents and at library events. She has presented writing workshops to primary-aged children. Last year, she was a presenter at the Sacred Edge festival and the Christian Writers’ Conference.
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